Bulletin Board, excerpt

Life as we know it

From (St. Paul Pioneer Press) Bulletin Board

Posted on Sat., Jan. 29, 2006

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Walt of Wayzata: "This would go under 'Block that simile!' "From an article in the February 2006 Car and Driver, talking about the Mercedes S550: 'The engine is as smooth as a poetry major on Ambien.' "

This 'n' that

Poet X of PDX: "My own vision is not what it used to be, but I think it was the Gothic lettering that made me misread a business sign a few hours ago. In large, cut-out letters, the sign I saw said: 'Jesus Peed for Your Sins.' That caused a double-take, of course, and I then realized it was a very fancy 'D' rather than a 'P' (and the next letter wasn't an 'e' but an 'i').

"The cat that I've always thought is more like a dog (hates milk, plays fetch, etc.) was in some kind of altercation a few weeks back; got bit near the base of the tail. When the wound became infected, a vet visit was made, and they shaved the hair from the base of the tail to apply a bandage. Now that the bandage is off, I've been calling Oscar the 'French poodle cat.' "

The darnedest things

WARNING! Cute kid story ahead, from Jeanne in California ("a.k.a. Aunt Jackie's favorite niece"): "When my son, Joey, was in first grade, he brought home his list of spelling words to study. I was quizzing him, and he was spelling the words to me. When I asked him to spell 'knock,' he spelled it 'nock.' I told him that that was close, but he'd forgotten a letter. Without missing a beat, he said: 'I know, but the first K is silent.' "

Band Name of the Day:

Poetry Majors on Ambien or: The French Poodle Cats